Prophetic Flamingos and Coveted Dinosaurs

So guess who hasn't shown up now for an entire week? Yes Flamingo, you were right. The woman who lies to me constantly–should I really be surprised that she has disappeared off the face of the earth? I asked another woman who works with her if she'd seen her lately.

"Not since she was fired. Why?"

Fired. Hm. I find it sad, but not surprising. Compulsive lying can't be a good quality on the job. Those poor (literally now) kids. Quel dommage. Tax write-off, and lesson learned. Trust not, that ye be not robbed.

I borrowed a "theme box" from Catholic Child and Family this week–they actually bring it by and pick it up when you're done. This week it was dinosaurs. The kids take the little plastic dinos outside and soon my seven year old comes in with a shirt full, bawling his eyes out. "Mom, I want all the dinosaurs."

Boo hoo.

We talk about why, all the things he could do if he had them all, etc. So I suggest he lets the other kids have them today, and he can have them tomorrow. No, he doesn't like that idea. He says they can have them the day after tomorrow.

"They have twenty nine, and I only have nine!"

"Yesterday you didn't have any, and you were happy, right?"


"If there were only nine in the box, and you had all nine, would you be happy?"

Sniffle. "Yeah."

"So if I go outside and take all their dinos and put them away in the cupboard, you'll be happy with your nine?"

He brightens a little. "Yeah."

What??????!!! What sort of child have I raised????? Just to be sure I understand him, I take a rhetorical approach.

"If I gave you ten dollars, would you be happy?"


"If I gave you ten and Jo eleven, would you be happy?"


At least he's honest.

"But you still have the ten, why would you be sad?"

"Because he has more!"


Did I mention that he has, in his shirt, nine of the coolest dinos? The ones that you can see their skeletons? His cache is, pound for pound, three times as big as what the other kids have, combined.  How do you talk reason to this mentality? He's sobbing, heartbroken over plastic dinosaurs, and I am having a panic attack over the prospect of the next sixty years, if he grows into this type of adult.





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